How to Build a Better Relationship With Your Manager (And Why It's Your Job Too)
July 20, 2026
Most advice about manager-employee relationships puts all the responsibility on leadership. But according to HR veteran Corey Crapella, who spent 15+ years leading teams of up to 4,500 employees across 45 locations, the strongest working relationships aren’t something managers hand down. They’re built in partnership.
In a recent conversation with Recognize CEO Alex Grande, Crapella broke down what actually makes a manager relationship work, why so many break down despite good intentions, and what employees can do to become easier to lead and more likely to grow.
Shift From Dependency to Partnership
The biggest mindset shift Crapella points to: stop viewing the manager relationship as one-directional. Instead of “my manager needs to do this for me,” ask “how do we support each other?”
This isn’t about ignoring the influence managers have; it’s about recognizing that employees can influence upward too. Understanding a manager’s goals, pressures, and priorities makes it easier to align with them and build real trust.
Why Manager Relationships Break Down
Despite good intentions, workplace relationships fail, and Crapella says it’s rarely about bad intent. The real culprits:
- Unclear expectations
- Assumptions instead of communication
- Pressure and deadlines that push managers back into “telling” instead of coaching
Managers know the value of buy-in, but under stress, most default to giving directives rather than developing people. Recognizing this pattern in yourself and your manager is the first step to breaking it.
Career by Design, Not by Default
One of Crapella’s core frameworks: career by design vs. career by default. Without a clear direction, people often wake up years into a role shaped entirely by other people’s decisions, not their own.
His advice for owning your career:
- Be proactive instead of waiting to be “tapped” for opportunities
- Ask for feedback directly
- Volunteer for stretch projects
- Clearly communicate where you want to go
As Crapella puts it, managers can’t help employees get somewhere they haven’t communicated wanting to go.
How Employees Can Become Easier to Lead
Trust and influence aren’t built through authority; instead, they’re built through consistency. Crapella’s guidance for employees who want more autonomy and trust from their manager:
- Be reliable. Small things like replying to an email and being on time either build or erode credibility.
- Communicate early and often. Over-communication beats untangling a miscommunication later.
- Confirm understanding. A quick recap after a call prevents costly misalignment down the road.
The Takeaway
Great manager-employee relationships aren’t dependencies. They’re partnerships built on trust, communication, and consistency. Recognition plays a critical role in that dynamic, but so does an employee’s willingness to advocate for their own growth.
As Crapella put it, don’t let a difficult manager become the reason your potential goes unrealized.
This recap is based on a live webinar hosted by Recognize featuring Corey Crapella, founder of Core Coaching and Consulting. Want more conversations like this? Recognize’s next session features Dominique Revere, founder of HR Remedy Consulting, on how managers can create belonging through everyday recognition.